lights will guide you

trying to decide what i want to write about tonight when there's so much going through my mind right now. one of the main things is about goals and how it's interesting how some people are goal motivated and some aren't. i am highly motivated by goals. if there's a number, i will reach it. and i want to be first or have the most of whatever we're counting. it took me a while to realize not everyone felt like that.

i just finished a really interesting book called the essential 55, and it's a list of rules one teacher uses to motivate his class and keep them well behaved and on track. some of them seemed a bit extreme at first..

ex: Rule 9. Always say thank you when I give you something. If you do not say it within 3 seconds of receiving the item, I will take it back. There is no excuse for not showing appreciation. 

Rule 44. When in a line, walk single file, two to three feet behind the person in front of you with your arms at your sides. You should face forward at all times. There will be no talking.  

but a lot of them make a lot of sense, including rules 9 and 44. he reminds you that kids love/need structure, and they're really proud of themselves for the way they walk down the halls with military precision.  he goes to the extreme of outlining their behavior for almost every situation imaginable (how to wash your hands in the bathroom, how to eat at a table, how to leave a message when calling to ask about homework, how to take your fair share of food at a buffet [only fill 3/4 of the plate, do not stack anything on top of another piece of food], you get the idea.)

so by the end, i was a convert. i would never take it to that level, but a few more rules would have been really helpful in any experience i've had with kids.

i can't help but hear the kids from chinese preschool and afterschool in my mind when thinking about rules. christopher, now a second grader, is the king of rules. if you do one thing out of accordance with the rules we had established, he would let you know. we tried to play memory with a chinese-only speaking 3 year old and he almost flipped when she kept turning over cards when it wasn't her turn yet. we eventually just made it a rule that she could do whatever she wanted and it didn't matter.